My obsession
by HellPhoenix
Summary: Tala Ivanov lives a perfectly normal, boring life. But one bad grade on an English essay can cause more trouble than you'd ever imagine. Kai/Tala. Rated M for rape, violence and sexual themes.
1. Chapter 1

A bell rang. The hallways were filled with loud and messy teenagers, running into each other as they tried to make it to class in time.

At this very moment, a pale redhead was standing outside the door to his classroom, trying to gather up the nerve to enter. Yes, Tala was scared. He hated English. It was his worst subject, and he had the worst teacher. A shiver went down his spine as he thought about it. _Professor Hiwatari. _The young man always yelled at him. Tala seemed to be his way of getting rid of some aggression.

Finally, he took a deep breath, and entered the classroom. Professor Hiwatari wasn't there yet. The redhead steeled himself for what was to come, as he quickly went over to his desk at the very front of the classroom. Professor Hiwatari had insisted that Tala was sitting in front. That way it would be easier to torture him.

"Open your books!" a dark voice commanded, and Tala jumped in his seat. He hadn't noticed Professor Hiwatari entering the room. Apparently, no one else had either, because the entire class just stared puzzled at the man.

"Now!" Hiwatari ordered. "That includes you, Ivanov." A wicked smirk graced the man's face as he added the last bit, making Tala growl in frustration. Professor Hiwatari was after him, he was sure of it.

The class went by slowly. Tala was listening to Hiwatari, reading and taking notes at the same time, and he was sure he could see a vicious glint in his teacher's eyes once or twice.

"Okay, that's it for today," Hiwatari announced as the bell rang, declaring that the class, and in this case, the school day, was over. "I've finished grading your essays; collect them on your way out."

As Tala was about to leave the classroom, he felt a strong hand grab a hold of his shoulder. The startled redhead turned around to see his teacher's face only inches apart from his own.

"Ivanov. My office."

"Y-yes, sir," Tala stuttered in reply. The young teacher scared him, and he wasn't ashamed to let it show. It had been that way since Tala had first come to the school three years earlier.

After the rest of the class had left, he followed Professor Hiwatari along the hallways for what seemed like eternity. The only thing he could think about was what it was he had done now, and how the teacher was going to punish him for it. They finally reached a door that had the teacher's name written on it. _Professor Kai Hiwatari. _It wasn't like the place was unfamiliar to Tala. He had been in Hiwatari's office by several occasions. Mostly to "discuss" his horrible grades.

"Sit down," the man said, and Tala obeyed. If he did as he was told, maybe he would get to leave soon. Hiwatari sat down behind his desk, staring at the redhead. He then threw Tala's essay on the desk.

"Another D, Ivanov. What do I have to do to make you realize it? This is not a joke! You will have to do better than this. But I assume that speech won't get to you, seeing as you haven't exactly improved from last time."

"I'm doing my best, sir," Tala whimpered, avoiding looking into his professor's ruby red eyes. "If only you didn't have such a hostile attitude towards me, I'm sure…"

"You're doing your best? So you're saying there's no room for improvement. What do you intend to do, Ivanov? Bribe me to get a better grade?"

"No!" Tala protested. "I do not know what you think of me, professor, but I would never do such a thing."

Hiwatari didn't seem to listen to him. The man stood up, walking around the desk, stopping as he was right behind Tala. "If that's the case, I know one thing that could persuade me to give you a higher grade." He leaned down over Tala, talking softly into the teenager's ear. "Would you like to improve you grade, Tala?"

"S-sir, you just called me Tala."

"I asked you a question, Tala. Do you wish to improve you grade?"

"Yes, professor." Tala was literally shaking now, as his teacher placed his hands on his shoulders, rubbing them softly. He then walked in front of the redhead, bending down, and – to Tala's great alarm – starting to unbutton his shirt.

"P-professor, what are you doing?" the redhead stuttered, his eyes wide in shock and horror.

Hiwatari ignored him as he pulled the teenager's shirt off, attempting to take Tala's pants off as well.

"Stop it," Tala said, his voice shaking, as he pushed the professor's hand away. "I… I don't want this…"

"Shut up," Hiwatari groaned, relieving the redhead of his pants only with a few simple movements. He then quickly got rid of his own clothing. "It's either this or failing. Frankly, Tala, you don't have a choice."

He pushed the redhead in front of him, making him bend down over the desk, his pale chest colliding with the cold surface.

"No…" Tala whispered in desperation. "Professor! No! Don't… please, don't…"

But his prayers weren't heard. Instead, a sharp pain shot up his spine as his professor thrust into him. He cried out in pain, but Hiwatari ignored him, and kept moving forcefully in a steady rhythm. Again and again Tala cried, screamed, shouted, whimpered and cursed. He was scared. There was nothing he could do. The professor was much too strong for the redhead to be able to put up a fight.

Then, finally, he could feel Hiwatari coming inside of him, the firm rhythm slowed down, and he realized that it was over. He tried to stand up, but fell back into his teacher's arms. He fought himself out of the rough grip, sinking down on the floor, sobbing.

"Why?" he asked, if the question was directed at himself or the professor, he wasn't sure of. "Why?"

"Relax," the cold voice of Professor Hiwatari sounded. "You're not going to tell anyone about this. If you do, I will fail you. Okay?"

Tala nodded, his teary ice blue eyes rising to meet his teacher's crimson orbs. "Why are you doing this to me, professor?"

"Let's just say it's a personal reason." Hiwatari sat down next to Tala, pulling him into a gentle hug, but the redhead fought himself out of it. He didn't want to – no, he _couldn't_ – be close to Professor Hiwatari.

He sat like that, on the floor, crying for what felt like forever. He felt veins pulsating viciously in his forehead, but was unable to stop the everlasting flow of tears.

"It hurts…" Tala whispered as he finally managed to push the tears back. However, more tears emerged in his dull blue eyes immideately. Professor Hiwatari, who had gotten dressed as the redhead was crying, sat back down and put an arm around the naked teenager. Tala didn't have the strength to push him away.

"I'm sorry," he said softly. "I'll go easier on you next time. I promise."

Tala nodded. The teacher's words made him want to throw up. _Next time._

"You should get home," the young man mumbled after a few minutes. He helped Tala to his feet, and then helped the redhead with getting dressed. He still looked like a wreck, though.

"I'll drive you home," the professor offered, receiving a nod from Tala. The redhead wanted to refuse. He didn't want to be in a car with the man who had just raped him. But he didn't have money for the bus, his mom was at work, so her picking him up was out of the question, and he wouldn't be able to walk all the way home. So he settled with having his teacher driving him home.

All the way home, Tala tried his hardest not to think. He tried to forget the fact that he was in a car with Kai Hiwatari, his teacher through three years. And more importantly, he tried to forget what the man had done to him.

"Well, here it is," the teacher said as he stopped in front of the small house in which Tala lived together with his mother. He wasn't sure if he would be able to go in yet, though.

"Professor," he started, without really knowing what to say. Hiwatari's auburn eyes settled on the redhead, a curious look in them.

"Yes, Tala?"

Tala tried his best to come up with something to say. He couldn't start a sentence without managing to end it, for God's sake! "How old are you?" he settled with.

A sad smile graced the teacher's pale lips. "I'm twenty-seven."

Tala nearly panicked. Sure, Professor Hiwatari looked young, but he had never imagined that the man would be under thirty. Then again, he had never imagined that he English teacher would rape him, and that happened, didn't it?

He should probably be running away. He should be scared to death, trying with all his strength to escape from the man who did this to him. He probably would too, if it were anyone else. But he knew Hiwatari. He had always been afraid, yes, but he knew him, nevertheless. Besides, the professor hadn't really hurt him, had he? He hadn't wanted to have sex with the man, but he wasn't injured. Just shocked, and slightly more scared than what he usually was around his teacher.

"I'm going now," he said quietly, getting out of the car. "Thank you for driving me home, Professor."

"Call me Kai."

The redhead nodded before closing the car door, and watching as the car disappeared into the dark. It was only about four in the afternoon, but the sun had almost set completely already. Well, that was how it was every winter. Tala liked the dark more than the light anyway.

He walked up to his home and unlocked the door, as his mother hadn't come home yet. He spent the entire walk up the stairs and into his room trying to convince himself that he would be okay, that everything would be fine, that it didn't matter what Professor Hiwatari… what Kai had done to him.

Then he broke down on the bed, crying.

---

Kai looked at himself in the mirror. Truth to be told, he was disgusted with himself. To take advantage of a child like that… It was unforgiveable.

_But Tala isn't a child, _a voice within his mind whispered. _He is eighteen now. He's an adult._

"That doesn't change the fact that I raped him," he said out loud. Hearing himself say if loudly, he felt tears emerging in the corners of his eyes. Ever since the first time he laid eyes on Tala, he had wanted, no, _needed_, to have sex with the boy. For three years he had kept his needs at bay.

He wasn't going to make any excuses. He could have stopped himself. He did posses self-control. But he hadn't wanted to stop. He wasn't going to pretend what he had done wasn't wrong either. Because it was. It had felt good at the time, but now, afterwards, Kai felt horrible. Yes, he had wanted to have sex with Tala. But he had wanted the redhead to want it too. What pleasure was there in having sex, if the other person didn't want it?

_No,_ he corrected himself. _It wasn't sex. It was rape._

He decided there and then that he would never do such a thing ever again. He had hurt Tala. He had caused serious mental damage to his beautiful Tala…

* * *

Okay, okay, this is the last "new" story I'm going to be writing until I have finished the ones I'm currently working on. I just needed to get this idea out of my head and over with. And to be honest, I think it turned out fairly well. Updates for both _Reaching for the sky, Love game _and _Betrayal_ are coming up soon, by the way.

Anyway, please review, everyone! Let me know whether I should keep writing or not xo


	2. Chapter 2

The following morning, Tala left for school before his mom even got up. He had locked the door to his room last night, and refused to open it no matter how much she begged him to come down and eat dinner. His mom knew him too well. She would realize something was wrong. She would make him tell… and he couldn't. Professor Hiwatari would fail him. And he was scared. Not because the man had ever done anything to physically harm him, maybe except for what he did the day before, but because if Kai wanted to, he could make Tala feel like a worthless piece of shit just by being in the same room as him. It was a frightening ability. And what was even more frightening, was the fact that Tala was the only one who was affected by it.

"Tala!"

The redhead spun around, his blue eyes searching for the source of the voice. He soon spotted his best friend, Bryan, in the crowd, making his way over to the redhead. Tala tried to smile at his friend, only to realize that he couldn't.

"Hey Bryan," he said, receiving a giant grin from the other teenager. However, when Tala didn't return the smile, his expression suddenly grew serious.

"What happened with Professor Hiwatari yesterday?"

Tala froze. "Nothing!" he hurried to say. "Nothing happened. What makes you think something happened?"

Bryan sighed as they started walking, side by side, along the hallway. "You were in his office after school, right? There must have been a reason he told you to come. Again."

"Oh." Tala breathed out. He couldn't afford having anyone notice. "It was just about my grades, as usual. I got a D on the essay."

"You're acting weird. Are you sure nothing else happened?"

"No, I already told you."

Bryan shook his head, and Tala avoided looking his best friend in the eyes. Bryan read his face like an open book. It was impossible to hide anything from him. But he had to. He couldn't let anyone find out about Professor Hiwatari.

The two boys were in one of the less crowded areas of the school, only a few other teenagers around them, talking, laughing. And teachers on their way to whichever classes they had this early in the morning.

"Hey, Ivanov!" Tala froze once again, not able to move, as he saw his English teacher approaching. Bryan shot him a weird glance, as if to say '_What the fuck is going on?'_

"I would like to see you in my office after school, Ivanov," the red-eyed male said. Tala was almost shocked by how cold he sounded as he uttered the redhead's surname, after how he had feverishly called him Tala the day before.

"Sir, I think you are being a little harsh on Tala," Bryan said. "He was in your office for nearly an hour yesterday. I mean, it's not like he killed anyone. Can't you cut him some slack?"

"It doesn't matter what you think, Kuznetsov. I want Tala in my office, so he will come to my office. That's how it works." He threw a quick glance at his wristwatch. "If you'll excuse me, I have to go. I'll see you after school, Ivanov." With that he walked away from the two boys, leaving Tala with a terrified look on his face. Bryan frowned as he saw how frightened his best friend was.

"Tala, I'm only going to ask you this once; what the fuck did he do to you?"

"I can't tell you," Tala whispered, tears starting to flow down his face. The few students that were there gave him weird glances.

"Come on, let's get you out of here," Bryan muttered, letting Tala lean on him as they walked away from the other teenagers, towards the exit.

Once they were outside, Bryan regretted his decision of where to go. It was in the beginning of January, and it was freezing. But at least Tala was out of sight from hundreds of curious students.

"Tala, what happened yesterday? What did Hiwatari do to you?"

"I told you, I can't say it!"

Bryan rolled his eyes, leading Tala over to one of the benches that stood just outside of the school. Luckily, it hadn't snowed all winter, so it was dry.

"Sit down," the boy said, and Tala obeyed. Just like he had done the day before in Professor Hiwatari's office. The comparison scared him.

He grimaced as he sat down, and at once, Bryan was over him again, asking questions.

"Are you alright? What happened? For God's sake, Tala, tell me, I can help you!"

"My ass hurts," the redhead growled, wiping the tears away from his face. Bryan tilted his head, looking at his best friend in disbelief.

"Does that have something to do with what Professor Hiwatari did to you?"

"Maybe," Tala admitted. Bryan frowned.

"Fuck, Tala! Just tell me already! I'm you best fucking friend, our English teacher did something horrible to you, and you won't even tell me what it was? Don't you trust me enough to do that?"

There was silence between them for a long time. Bryan stared angrily at Tala, and Tala studied his shoe tips. The school bell even rang, but still, there was nothing but silence. From Bryan's point of view, it seemed like the redhead was ignoring him. But there was something completely different going on in Tala's head. He wanted to tell Bryan what had happened. He was just trying to gather the strength to do it. To actually say that word out loud…

"He raped me," Tala finally said, his voice nothing more than a whisper that soon drowned in giant sobs.

"Tala…" Bryan was obviously shocked. "You should have told me from the beginning, you idiot! We have to go to the police or whatever it is they do when people get raped…"

"No!" Tala objected. "You can't tell anyone. Please Bryan, just shut up about it. I'll handle it. Just… don't say anything, okay?"

"What? Tala, he fucking _raped_ you! It's illegal! You can't let him get away with it just because you're scared."

"Well, he didn't really hurt me… And… If he tries to do it again, I'll fight back. I'll scream for help. I'll run away."

"What the fuck do you mean by 'if'? He told you to come to his office after school. I think that's proof enough that he's going to rape you again."

"Stop saying that," Tala whispered, starting to cry again. "That word… It just… I feel so…dirty… I just want to forget it ever fucking happened!"

Bryan sat down next to the redhead, putting an arm protectively around him. "You're my best friend, Tala. I can't just sit and watch while you're breaking down."

"Please, Bryan," Tala whispered in between his sobs. "I'll be okay. I can handle it. Just… please don't tell anyone…"

Bryan sighed loudly. "Okay… Okay. I won't say anything. But if he ever does this to you again, I'm going to the police, you get it? If you ever break down crying without a reason, I will assume that he…" The boy didn't finish the sentence, knowing that Tala really didn't want to hear _that word._ It was perfectly clear what he meant, though.

---

Tala didn't have English that day. To Kai, it was like hell. He simply couldn't find any reason to be locked in a classroom with a bunch of noisy teenagers and dusty Shakespeare-scripts, when his Tala was out there somewhere, alone and scared.

Kai hated himself for what he had done. But he still cared about Tala. He wanted to make everything right again. He wanted to make the redhead care about him the same way he did for Tala. He loved the boy, and he wasn't ashamed to admit that to himself. He just wanted Tala to return his feelings… Was that really so wrong?

It couldn't be. It wasn't. The reason why he had done what he did… there was nothing wrong to it whatsoever. It was just his actions. What he had done to the boy, that was what was wrong, not _why_ he did it.

A thin voice ripped him out of the thoughts. "Professor Hiwatari, you don't look so good." Kai looked up, his eyes finding the rose-haired girl who had spoken, on the first row, in Tala's seat. _Tala._

He frowned. "I feel perfectly fine. But you, young lady, should spend less time wondering about how I feel, and more time taking notes, or I will give you detention for the rest of your miserable life."

The girl gave him a startled look, before hurrying to focus on the assignment. Kai smiled ever so slightly to himself. Yes, he enjoyed scaring the students. It had started with Tala. He had been extremely strict to the redhead, all to prevent that someone might take notice of his feelings towards the young boy. Tala had been fifteen at the time.

Then, finally, the bell rang. The class was over. School was over. Tala would be in his office soon.

"Get the fuck out of here," he muttered to the awaiting students, before leaving the classroom, hurriedly walking towards his office. He didn't want Tala to come there and find it empty. The redhead would surely leave. Kai didn't want him to leave. He wanted to be close to Tala, right now, right here. He simply couldn't imagine a life without his dear Tala.

His office was empty when he got there. He hoped Tala hadn't been there already. He needed to see the redhead. He had to tell him how sorry he was…

He sat down behind his desk, simply waiting for the teenager to show up. Every second he became more desperate and concerned. What if Tala didn't show up? What if he was too scared? Kai couldn't stand the thought of the redhead being scared of him.

When there finally was a knock on the door, Kai almost didn't dare believing that it was Tala.

"Come in," he said loudly, and the door opened immediately. Tala entered.

"Ivanov," Kai mumbled, watching as the redhead closed the door behind him. He would have to get used to referring to the boy by his surname.

Tala remained standing by the door.

Suddenly, Kai was unable to control himself. He got up from the chair, quickly walking towards the sexy redhead standing by the door. What was he doing? He had decided to end this, for God's sake! And now, he suddenly lost all self-control…

His hands entwined in Tala's blood colored hair, his lips devouring the teenager's own with hot kisses. He licked the redhead's lower lip, begging for entrance, which he was soon granted. He was ecstatic, his tongue exploring every inch of Tala's mouth, his hands caressing the boy's body.

That was when he first actually became aware of what it was he was doing. He hastily pulled away, taking several steps back, before he was positive he wouldn't do such a stupid thing again.

"I… I'm so sorry," he exclaimed, not daring to look at the redhead.

"It's okay," Tala's soft voice sounded. "At least this didn't…hurt…"

Kai's panic grew to be even bigger. "Tala, I… I'm sorry! I never meant to hurt you…"

"I told you, it's okay," the redhead repeated, as he slowly walked towards the teacher. "I just want to know why. Why would you do this to me?"

Kai swallowed. "I… I'm sorry, Tala. I shouldn't have asked you to come here. I don't… I can't trust myself around you. I don't realize what I'm doing until it's already done."

The teenager was standing right in front of him now, their faces only inches apart. Finding that he once again was unable to control himself, Kai placed a chaste kiss on the boy's lips. Tala didn't step back. He simply stood still, staring into the man's ruby red eyes.

"You really have no idea how long I've been wanting to do that," Kai muttered when the beautiful teenage boy remained silent.

"How long?" Tala asked softly.

Kai sighed. "Three years." A sign of shock could be seen in the redhead's eyes, but it vanished as quickly as it had appeared.

"Three years?"

Kai nodded. "Ever since you started school here."

Tala hesitated for a moment, but never broke the eye contact. "I wouldn't put you as gay," he finally said, his voice barely a whisper. A sad smile graced Kai's lips.

"And I wouldn't put you as the kind of person to have this sort of conversation with the man who raped you."

The redhead took a step backwards.

"I'll be leaving now, Professor."

Kai nodded. "Tala… When can I see you again?"

"I have English third period tomorrow, sir."

Another nod from Kai. As the redhead turned to leave, Kai – deciding it would probably be safe – placed a hand on the young boy's shoulder. Tala turned around, giving his teacher a confused glance, before Kai kissed the redhead's lips softly. Tala didn't pull away, but he didn't kiss back, either. He simply stood there, waiting patiently for it to end.

When Kai pulled away, he could see a trace of a smile on Tala's face, before the boy turned around and left the room. Whether the smile was from the kiss itself, or from the fact that the kiss had ended, Kai couldn't figure out. He frowned. Everything was just way too complicated.

* * *

Okay, I know that it has been too damn long... Especially as I actually had this ready a few days after I published the first chapter. I feel so mean, torturing you guys by making you wait forever for something that is alreay finished.

Anyway, I am now working on the third chapter, but it's going to take quite some time. It'll probably be up sometime during Christmas holidays.

For now, I hope that everyone enjoyed this chapter, and that all my faithful readers will be kind enough to review. And I'll see you in the next chapter! -blows kisses-


	3. Chapter 3

Bryan and Spencer were standing outside of the school, waiting for him. Tala smiled slightly. His two best friends, the ones who had always been there for him, supporting him, not matter what. And they still were. Now, more than ever, they barely left his side.

He could see the worried glances his thoughtful expression earned. "Nothing happened," he assured them. They didn't seem convinced, though.

"Are you sure?" Spencer asked. Tala half-heartedly regretted having told Spencer about what happened. But it was better this way. He wouldn't have been able to hide it anyway.

"You seem pretty lost," Bryan added, nodding. "Are you sure he didn't do anything to you?"

"Nothing happened," the redhead repeated. "Just a kiss. It's nothing."

His friends' jaws dropped. "What?" they said in unison. But they weren't angry. How could they be? They were just shocked. Shocked that the teacher had the nerve to kiss the redhead so carelessly, like they were a normal couple. And shocked that Tala was okay with it.

"It was just a kiss," Tala sighed. "It's not like kissing someone is illegal."

Bryan shook his head. "It's not about whether it's illegal or not, Tala! The point is that he did it against you will. You can't allow him to do that, or he'll just keep taking advantage of you in the future."

Tala shrugged his shoulders. "It's no big deal, really. If it's such a bad thing, then it's my fault too, for not trying to push him away."

Bryan and Spencer just stared at him.

"Anyway, I better head home," Tala mumbled after a few minutes of unbearable silence. "I'll see you guys tomorrow."

Spencer nodded. "Take care, Tala."

With and assuring nod in return, Tala turned around and started walking home. As he walked around the first corner, he noticed the figure that was standing there, leaned against his car. Rough, yet slender lines, the toned chest under the white shirt. And the mane of two-toned blue hair hanging down in his face.

"Do you need a ride home?" Kai asked as Tala stopped in front of him. His voice was just a tad shaky, and the crimson eyes avoided look directly at the redhead.

"Sure," Tala replied, nodding slightly. Kai nodded in return, stepping into the car, as Tala walked around the black car, opening the door and entered the passenger's seat.

"Thanks," he mumbled, looking up at his English teacher. Kai's eyes were focused on the road.

Tala hadn't noticed how beautiful Kai's eyes were before. Was it really possible, for someone to have the most beautiful rubies in the world as eyes?

"No problem," Kai replied, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly. "I wouldn't want you to walk out alone in the cold.

"Why," Tala started, swallowing, "why do you care?"

Kai shrugged his shoulders in the same careless way, but this time, he gave Tala a swift glance, accompanied by a smile.

That was the first time he saw Kai smile. The slight movements of a few muscles in his cheeks seemed to warm up all of his features, and the red eyes looked like a burning fireplace. Warming, soothing, gentle, safe, assuring.

"I don't know," the man finally replied, and by the time he did this, his features were once again sold and stiff, and his beautiful eyes were focused on the road. "I don't know," he repeated. "I just do."

Tala turned his head, looking out of the window. House after house passed by them. To Tala, they all looked the same. Each house had exactly the same shape, exactly the same size, exactly the same color, and exactly the same flowers just inside of the windows. It looked fake, fabricated. So different from the man next to him, who was completely unlike anyone he had ever met.

It was like the only real thing in the world was the red-eyed teacher.

Then, before too much time had passed, the car was slowing down, and Kai pulled up in the driveway in front of Tala's house.

"Thank you, sir," Tala mumbled. Kai smiled ever so slightly, before leaning down to whisper something in the teenager's ear.

"It's Kai." Tala nodded slowly, and before he knew it, he felt a pair of hot lips covering his own. He closed his eyes as his lips clumsily responded to the kiss. He moaned slightly after Kai bit down on his lower lip. The man quickly slipped his tongue inside Tala's mouth, re-exploring every inch.

The redhead moaned into the kiss. It… felt good. Illogically and undoubtedly good.

Then Kai leaned over him, pinning the redhead against the door. His hands reached down to unbutton Tala's shirt, a task which they managed with success.

Tala wriggled under the weight of the older man. Yes, the kissing felt good, but this… He didn't want this. It reminded him too much of _that_ _day._ He was surprised to realize that it had happened the day before. Yesterday seemed a thousand years away right now.

"Kai…" he whimpered, but his English teacher ignored him, and started unzipping the redhead's pants.

"Kai, stop it…"

Ruby red eyes look up at him in an apologetic glance. "Forgive me," he whispered, before capturing the teenager's lips in a passionate kiss.

Tala almost didn't notice the frantic screaming and knocking on the car window. Almost. Both he and Kai looked up at the same time, staring wide-eyed at the redheaded woman.

The door was opened. Tala fell backwards, but his mother's arms caught him and a firm grip.

"What the hell do you think you're doing to my son?" she snarled at Kai, who was now lying on his stomach over the front seats in the car. "You're sick, do you know that? Taking advantage of an innocent boy like that… a boy! Don't you realize how traumatic this must be for him?"

"Mom…" Tala mumbled, but the woman ignored him, and continued yelling at Kai. "Mom, stop it!" the teenager shouted. She held her tongue, but gave the man another poisonous glare before looking at her son, whom she was still holding in a protective grip.

"What's wrong, Yuriy?" she asked softly. "Do you know this man?"

"Don't call me that," Tala growled in annoyance. "My name is Tala. So start fucking calling me Tala! And… it's okay. He didn't hurt me."

His mother gave him a strict look. "I'm your mother, Yuriy. I named you Yuriy, and that's what your name is going to be. Besides, you didn't answer my question. Do you know this man?"

Tala bit his lip. He didn't want to answer that question. If his mom found out who Kai was, then he would be in trouble. As strange as it might seem, Tala didn't want anything to happen to the older man.

"I'm his teacher," Kai said, crawling out of the car with as much dignity as he could manage. Tala's mom practically stared her son into the house, not taking her furious eyes from him until the door was closed behind him.

Tala wasn't able to hear what they were saying, but they were probably having an argument. It seemed to take forever before his mom entered the house.

"If he ever goes near you again, I'm going to the police," she snapped. All of the care and protectiveness was gone. Disappeared. Tala rolled his eyes. He had never had a good relationship with his mom. Being a single mom, she had to work day and night to provide them both with food, clothes and shelter. They had never had the opportunity to bond like a mother and child usually do.

But he didn't want anything to happen to Kai. He wasn't sure why, but if his teacher ended up being arrested, Tala would probably feel guilty about it for the rest of his life. If anything happened to Kai… Tala wouldn't be able to handle it.

It was a bit weird, thinking those things about the man that he up until today had been terrified of. But when he had been in the teacher's office, something had changed about his impression of the older male. Something in those eyes had awoken an unknown feeling in Tala. Somewhere, beneath the indifferent and cold attitude, the redhead had sensed genuine feelings. Regret. That had been the strongest of them. Somehow, the eyes that normally showed no expression but anger, became a window into the depths of Kai's soul.

The man that Tala had been afraid of; that wasn't Kai at all. He wasn't sure why, but he wanted, more than anything, to find out more about Kai. The real Kai.

He cared about Kai. Not Professor Hiwatari, with the cold facade and heart of stone. Kai. The one he had gotten a glimpse of today, and that he wanted to explore, get to know.

But that was impossible. Because if he as much as talked to him out of class, the man with the ruby eyes would be arrested. Locked up. If Tala's mom ever found out… The redhead suddenly smirked. That woman was always at work, anyway.

_What you don't know, won't hurt you._

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Short, crappy chapter ._. The plot line is going too fast, and nothing seems convincing at all! But there's really nothing I can do about it. So I guess the best thing I can do is to continue the story and hope that it will work out...

Well, I had actually already written this chapter in one of my note books in school, so all there was to do was to find it (which took quite a while), type it up on my laptop and make a few adjustments. To fix the parts that were fixable. Heck, is that even a word? xD

Well, that's it, then. I'll update as soon as possible, blah, blah, blah... You know the roll ;) And please review. _please_! -puppy eyes-


	4. Chapter 4

The first two lessons were unbearable for Tala. He wanted to see Kai. He had to talk to him. But he needed an excuse to do so, the way Bryan and Spencer were watching over him. And English class would be perfect. Kai would hold him back to talk about an essay or a bad grade or whatever, and then they could talk. Then Tala could try to figure this man out.

Professor Granger's words were floating lazily around Tala's head. Math really wasn't what he wanted to do right now. He wanted to be in English class. Kai's class.

_God, what am I thinking?_ he thought, shaking his head forcefully. He shouldn't be looking forward to seeing this man. His heart shouldn't be pounding this hard inside his chest. He shouldn't be blushing this way. Not because of him. Not because of the man who raped him.

So why was he reacting this way by the thought of Kai?

Why?

Still, he was unable to get the man out of his mind. Even when the bell rang, and he rushed through the hallway, heading for Kai's classroom, all he could think about was the beautiful, dual-haired man.

When he entered the classroom, he was greeted with a glare from Kai. His mood dropped like a rock, but, seeing as there were other students already in the classroom, it was impossible to talk to the teacher just yet. He walked over to his seat, finding a concerned Bryan next to him.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, to which Tala rolled his eyes.

"I'm absolutely, completely, undeniably fine," he replied. But Bryan's worried gaze wouldn't seem to disappear.

"He hurt you," he said quietly. "He hurt you, both physically and mentally. Yesterday, you were breaking down because of it. And now you want be to believe that you are 'fine'?"

Tala opened his mouth, about to say something – though he wasn't sure what – when he was interrupted by Kai's voice, "Okay, everyone, shut up so I can hear myself think."

The students immediately went quiet, earning a smirk from the red-eyed teacher.

Tala had never been more grateful for a class to begin. However, with every minute that passed, it became more and more clear to him that paying attention was _impossible._ He was too impatient for what was going to happen after class.

He blushed as he realized that his mind had formed those exact words. He must be out of his mind for thinking something like that, even though he had completely misunderstood himself. He was acting like a goddamned love-struck teenager.

His right hand, that was supposed to be taking notes, moved on its own will, drawing the pen over the notebook without Tala even looking down at it. When he finally looked down, he realized that he had drawn a clearly recognizable – rather gauche and tasteless, but recognizable, nevertheless – portrait of Kai. A quiet growl made its way past his lips, and Tala had to fight the urge to smash his head against the desk. How could anything ever be more embarrassing than this?

He looked to his side to find that Bryan was half asleep, as usual, before quickly turning over to a new page in his notebook. He was going to be in _so_ much trouble if his friends saw this.

The lesson went by slowly; minute by torturous minute. Tala was starting to wonder what he had done to deserve this kind of punishment. At times, it seemed that this one lesson was never going to end.

When the bell finally rang, Tala took a long time to put the books away in his bag, making sure that he would be the last one to leave the classroom. Knowing Bryan well enough to be sure that he was still far too tired to comprehend anything that was going on around him, Tala watched his friend leave the classroom before anyone else.

As the last student left the room, Tala walked up behind Kai, who was busy wiping off the blackboard.

"Kai?" he said tentatively, not sure of how the older male would react. "I'm sorry we were… interrupted yesterday." Tala mentally slapped himself. He might as well have said _please fuck me_.

"No, you're not," Kai stated. He turned around, ruby red eyed piercing ice blue ones. "You hated what I was doing to you. I could see it then, and I can see it now."

Tala took one step towards his teacher. "Yes, I suppose… I didn't like what you were doing," he admitted quietly. "But that does not mean I wanted to be away from you."

"Quit messing around, Ivanov," Kai said angrily. He walked past Tala quickly, almost running out the door. After a moment's hesitation, Tala followed him.

He didn't even bother knocking before opening the door to Kai's office; the door that the teacher so rudely had slammed shut right in Tala's face.

"Kai, why are you ignoring me?" he hissed.

He was answered with a glare from the dual-haired man. "You are a student," he stated, "and you are to call me 'Professor Hiwatari', or 'sir', if you'd like."

Tala frowned. "You weren't like this yesterday," he muttered.

"Deal with it, Ivanov," Kai snapped. "Now, get out of my office."

"But I want to be close to you!" Tala whined. "I mean, surely, I'm not comfortable being raped, but I want to be _here._ With _you._"

He had been walking towards Kai during the entire conversation, if it could be called that, and was now standing right in front of him, their faces only inches apart.

Kai growled, grabbing Tala by the waist and successfully pinning him against the wall. "You selfish little brat," he snarled. "You don't know the first thing about me. Don't think you've got me all figured out, because you don't! You just don't understand anything!" Kai was yelling by now, and Tala could do nothing but stare at his teacher.

"You don't know me," Kai continued. He had calmed down; talking quietly, avoiding looking Tala in the eyes. "You know nothing about me, my life, my feelings, or what kind of problems you are going to get us both into."

Tala swallowed. Kai was right. He really didn't know anything about the older male, and he had no idea whatsoever he was about to get himself into. But he couldn't just give up. He wanted to know the real Kai, didn't he?

"I… I know that I don't have a clue about anything when it comes to you," he said, his voice only a tad shaky. "But I want to understand you. I want to get to know you, Kai."

The dual-haired man sighed, shaking his head. "I understand that I'm the one who started this," he mumbled, lifting his gaze to meet Tala's for a mere second. "And that was wrong of me." He let go of Tala's waist, taking a few steps back. "Report me to the police, charge me with rape, do whatever the hell you want, Ivanov. But don't let me ruin your life."

Tala was sure he stopped breathing. "Kai…?" His voice was barely audible, and he was surprised when his English teacher replied with a short chuckle.

"Forget about me, Ivanov," he said, a sad smile gracing his lips. "I'm just a sad excuse for a man. You go on and find your friends. I'm sure they're worried about you."

Confused, Tala slowly walked past the older man, leaving the office without looking back. A frown formed on his face. What the hell was going on?

He found Bryan and Spencer in the cafeteria, flashing a fake smile as he walked over to them. "Hey," he said, confident that the pain and confusion wasn't showing on his face. There was no use in thinking about Kai now. Maybe he would find a chance to talk to the older man sometime. But to be quite honest, he doubted that it would ever happen. Kai had seemed so… determined. Even though saying those things had clearly hurt him.

"Where've you been?" Spencer asked. Both of Tala's friends seemed calm and composed, but Tala knew that they were both worried to death, and on the verge to go straight to Kai's office and murder the teacher if Tala showed even the slightest sign of weakness.

"Oh, I had to get some stuff from my locker," Tala replied, waving a hand in the air as if to wave the question away. He then sat down, still smiling what he hoped resembled his trademark cocky smile. "So, anything interesting going on?"

Both boys mumbled a "oh, nothing", and Tala laughed shortly.

"What? You're seriously telling me that there's nothing going on in your life, Spence?" he grinned. "What happened? Did your boyfriend dump you?"

Spencer blushed just slightly (so little that anyone else than Tala and Bryan wouldn't even notice), and looked away.

Tala knew for a fact that Spencer was interested in some shorty from Tala's math class; an annoying blonde called Max Tate. What his friend really saw in the little guy was beyond Tala's realm of comprehension. But hey, who was he to judge?

"I thought we agreed never to talk about him," Spencer said, seeming a lot calmer than Tala knew he really was.

Tala snorted. "Fine, fine. We'll find something _boring_ to talk about."

"It doesn't necessarily have to be boring," Spencer smirked. "Unless you find Bryan crushing on Hilary Tachibana boring, of course."

Tala's eyes widened. "Really?" he questioned, his eyes directed at Bryan. When the other teenager nodded shortly, all Tala could do was to laugh.

This conversation was far from what anyone would believe the three boys were capable of. They were the outcasts of the school. More precisely, they were not 'normal'. Most students didn't even think of them as human.

It was true that they were different, though. All three of them had Russian origins, and they were proud of it (even though Tala had abandoned his original Russian name for the native American name that meant wolf). They could be seen around school, speaking to each other in Russian almost at all times.

They were normal teenagers, though, and they loved to pester each other with those sorts of things.

Tala sighed as he looked out of the window, up at the clouded sky. Wasn't the sky supposed to reflect a person's feelings in situations as these? Shouldn't it be raining heavily, symbolizing his terrible mood?

Or maybe this void sky really did represent his feelings. Because right now, all Tala felt was an overwhelming emptiness.

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Sorry for the long wait, everyone. I actually intended to upload this a lot sooner, but I had some major trouble with my my computer...

Anyway, please review! And I'll see you in the next chapter!


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